The Wedgwood Tea Room
Wedgwood Drive
Barlaston
Stoke-on-Trent
ST12 9ER
Afternoon Tea: £25.00pp*
Served 12:00 – 16:00
Howdy, folks. I was going to add this to my mega post about the delights of Stoke-on-Trent and the sweeping vistas of Hanley town center, but it occurred to me that if this was in London I would devote an entire post to its quality and elegance. This is on a par with the best afternoon tea’s available in the capital, and to tag it to the end of my last post as an afterthought would be to do it an injustice. This is a great place. Who doesn’t love a good pot? Whenever I explore a museum I often search the collection in the vain hope of finding a rare Wedgwood chamber pot or eggcup from the 1770’s. Incidentally, back when I was an international jetsetter** I would often bring my mum back an eggcup as a memento from whichever part of the world I could get to cheaply on Lastminute.com, a gesture which backfired when she greeted my latest offering with the immortal line ‘for God’s sake, how many eggs do you think one person can eat, you stupid sod? Stop bringing this crap into my house.’ I retaliated by bringing back souvenir shot glasses instead. She was going to receive my thoughtful acts of love whether she bloody wanted them or not!
**BA standard class to Prague. One seat down from the toilets. M&S toastie and a bag of mini Jaffa Cakes mid-flight
Location – Er… I have no idea. I was driven here and I was a bit distracted by a Chicago song that came on Moorlands Radio. Stuffing balls of tissue into bleeding ears will do that to a blogger. Sorry. There were a lot of trees. It’s also near to a place called Tittensor which is funny for reasons immature people will understand. The museum itself is a haven for ceramic enthusiasts with an extensive collection of items from the 1760’s right up to the present day
Fun fact – Josiah Wedgwood, perhaps the most famous creator of pottery of all time, could NOT operate a potters wheel. This was due to the amputation of his right leg after contracting smallpox as a child, hindering his ability to use the pedal mechanism of a traditional pottery wheel. He also left school at nine-years-old with no formal education, so if you are worried about how many lessons your child missed during the lockdowns, remember all that Wedgwood achieved and what your child can do if they have the luck, skills and determination to succeed… even though it is most likely they will end up as a recruitment consultant commuting in from Staines
Atmosphere – Lots of bold patterns and comfy chairs to snuggle into. Oh, and there’s a creature made up of cups and saucers. That’s… a thing
Service – This is Staffordshire. Everyone is lovely in Staffordshire. Who doesn’t like hearing themselves referred to as ‘duck’ by a stranger who can’t be bothered to memorize their actual name? To be honest, that is rather unfair. The people I met during my trip were very friendly and were always chatty and happy to help. The staff at World of Wedgwood are no exception. They are professional and bubbly with a easiness of manner that is natural rather than rehearsed (I once watched a documentary about Claridge’s where the staff were practicing the banter they planned to have with a couple who stayed regularly at the hotel. It’s sad that human warmth can be put on and taken off as quickly as a uniform)
Our server was a spirited fellow-me-lad who laughed along at the jokes made at our table (not told by me. People laugh enough when I speak without intentionally encouraging them to do so) and didn’t mind when a member of our party started lecturing him about who Winston Churchill was (again, not me. I have faith that the whippersnappers know more than just what is trending on TikTok and where to score Monkey Dust. It would have been hilarious though if he’d turned around and said ‘of course I know who Winston is. He’s the best Ghostbuster after Egon’). He was also happy for my Dad and I to share one tea between the two of us, a massive plus when you’ve had a sneaky scone earlier in the day and are panicking about where you’ll find room to put two more
Presentation – A mix of styles that show Wedgewood’s extensive design range to its best advantage. Flawless
Sandwiches – Perfectly cut and generously filled. The selection includes ham and cream cheese (lovely), chicken with lemon mayonnaise & watercress (divine), egg mayonnaise (pass me a bucket), smoked salmon with crème fraiche & dill (good) and cheddar with chutney (I need another bucket). You see, as the youngest person at the table and with my Dad unwilling to let good food go to waste, I felt obliged to eat my allotted portion of everything, even though just the thought of mashed egg and chutney is enough to make me heave. So, as a dutiful daughter swallowing down the retort of ‘I’ll pay. If I pay I won’t feel guilty about not eating them. No, we won’t take the bastard things home to have tomorrow! This isn’t Mommy Dearest,’ I nibbled away until they were gone, and guess what I discovered? Yes, that’s right folks… they’re bloody horrible! This isn’t like when I neglected curry for 34 years only to have an epiphany with one well-chosen Rogan Josh. They are unspeakably vile and only decorum prevented me from hiding them in a napkin and smuggling them out to the nearest bin. Oh cucumber, where for art thou?
Scones – Warm, fluffy and with lots of juicy currants. They are quite small but after a mammoth cherry scone earlier in the day these were perfect and left ample room for the desserts. Oh, the desserts, the desserts…
Desserts – My Dad and I went halves on everything except the berry panna cotta which I polished off without assistance (I did offer him the chocolate Wedgwood disc to compensate but he politely declined). Other delights include a sumptuous chocolate brownie, a strawberry macaron (is it macaron or macaroon? This really bugs me. I suggest we form a mob and storm the French embassy until someone gives us an answer. Who’s suddenly at work or got a chicken in the oven they can’t leave?), a vanilla and caramel cheesecake and a delightful Bakewell tart. They are small, perfectly formed and utterly delicious. Top marks
Tea – Having re-read the menu I stole because it was blue and decorated with monkeys (souvenirs. I’m not paying £12 for 12 teabags in the giftshop. I’m not a tourist, you know) I’ve since realised that we didn’t take advantage of the unlimited selection of signature teas on offer. My Dad had a single pot of English breakfast whilst I opted for a separate pot of Strawberry and Kiwi because even as a grown adult with numerous pensions plans I feel the need to rebel. If I’d known the tea was unlimited I would have skipped the display case of cameos and sat encamped in the café getting the ‘yoof’ young enough to be my son to ferry extra pots to the table. That’s not an exaggeration. I’m 34 and was born in Stoke. By rights I should be a grandmother by now
Service: 5/5
Surroundings: 4/5
Savory selection: 4/5
Scones: 5/5
Dessert selection: 5/5
Verdict – A lovely, elegant way to spend the afternoon. 5/5 Wedgwood teacups
*Prices/information correct as of 03/08/21
Feel free to share stories, views and tips in the comments section below. Always fun to hear from fellow teaholics xx
Scones In The City 